not a wealth of stealth

Emerson said: "who you are speaks so loudly, I can't hear what you're saying."

When I was 18, for a reason I don't remember and can't explain now, I became a bow hunter.

Since I don't do anything half-way, I set out on my first hunting trip to the back country in full camouflage, with face paint and even a dash of skunk scent applied in the way most men would apply cologne.

After traipsing through the forest for several hours and seeing nothing in the way of game to shoot at, I came across a field of several hundred cows.

I snuck up to the field. When I reached the fence line, I got down and crawled on my stomach to avoid detection, attempting to bypass the bovines without disturbing them.

I crawled with my head down for about 100 yards and then looked up for the first time. I was shocked by what I saw.

All the cows were staring at me, in the way that only cows can stare, with their heads cocked to the side, standing totally motionless, without so much as a tail wag.

At that point, one of the cows, which I assume was the alpha cow, walked up to within five feet of where I was hiding in the grass and proclamed: "moo". Not one of those slow gutteral "mmmmmmmmmmmeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwww" kind of moos but a moo that was just a single loud sharp syllable. And then the cow walked away, having taken care of herd business, leaving me humiliated in the grass.

I never bagged any game that day or really on any other day, for that matter. I couldn't even sneak up on a cow.

Sometimes when I face groups of people, I think I'm being all subtle, silently cloaking my true intentions, and I think that other people can't really see what I'm up to. But alas, I might just as well be transparent and come out with it because they can see through me anyway.

Go to http://stepup,net/ for more clues about how to present yourself in a compelling way.