tapping the system

Last year after 12 years of intense, full-time coaching of challenging, alpha-male entrepreneurs, I got myself burned out. The actual diagnosis was adrenal fatigue.

The adrenal system is the body's finely tuned stress management system and under repeated strain it eventually just gives out.

There are many lifestyle and dietary shifts to recover from burnout and it can take over a year to restore adrenal function. I cut out caffeine. transfats, most of the dairy I'm allergic to and much of the flour and sugar. I've shortened my work days and have added additional spa days. I've taken up golf, although, I'll see if this ultimately helps or hurts my stress level.

In addition to my physical lifestyle changes, in the past year I've had to look seriously at how I do my work.

My clients are very successful and very challenging. They have already looked under most of the rocks in their lives and businesses that might suggest clues to future growth and value creation. For me to be of value I have to operate within the cracks of what they they have not looked for and in the shadows of what they do not see.

I'll call the coach I was for the last thirteen years "Keith 1.0". I would say that one of the things that "Keith 1.0" did was take too much responsibility for solving the problems and finding solutions for the clients. This was natural since in my previous life I was a professional designer hired for my ability to solve problems and find solutions.

One of the ways that this behaviour shows up is in how much I choose to speak during a conversation with a client. Like many people, I do like the sound of my own voice and I've assumed, perhaps incorrectly, that if I'm not talking I'm not adding any value. This is the attitude that has left me burned out.

The new version of me is "Keith 2.0". This version remembers that people have the answers themselves. They are very intelligent, very creative and very capable and yet they are held back by what they do not see and do not know about themselves. My job is simply to help them shift their perspective and shine some light on some blindspots. Once they see what they don't see, their already considerable talents kick in and create a solution for themselves. This is vastly less taxing on my adrenals, but I've had to come to terms with the insecurity of appearing to not be "doing" much for my clients.

I used to be an archer. One of the things I remember about shooting a bow and arrow is this: a very small adjustment in aim makes for a very large variance once the arrow travels the distance to the target. And the longer the view, the more that very small errors in perspective and perception can accumulate to make for very large differences in results.

I don't have to do the work of pulling back the bow string. I just have to tap my clients on the shoulder, remind them of what they say is important and get them to make slight adjustments in aim and stance. The arrow then flies where it wants to fly.